you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
