i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Randomize