There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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