Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
How does it feel to date your dad?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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