He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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