The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize