laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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