new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
