Taylor Swift is so right about you.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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