i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
did i walk over a car last night?
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
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