This is not my ceiling
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
