Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
i now understand why vodka
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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