ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize