I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now