I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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