He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
