I cannot find my penis.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
