i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize