were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
