I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
