the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
