we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
