You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
