why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
