at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize