Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
