we have pet lesbian snakes
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
