we're blogging at a bar
Quick, to the slutcave!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
