You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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