That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
