God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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