Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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