I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
