Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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