"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Pooping to opera.
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