I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
