Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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