how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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