It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
