just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
