I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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