Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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