I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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