I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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