So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
