Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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