i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
