GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
