meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
