R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
