Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
